Countdown to Graduation

Tomorrow marks the day that Graduation tickets go on sale and I am so excited! I have been waiting for this day to come for ages and after three years, I am now finished with university and going to be graduating on October. That means I have a few more months for me to lose some more weight (a weight update will be coming real soon) and to decide what I should wear. I think graduation is one of those days where you can feel accomplished and to just breathe in all the achievements you have gained after a long time coming. I have already been looking at graduation dresses and looking up all the things needed for the ceremony  like booking my robe and how much tickets I need to buy (I still don’t know if Vanessa will be able to make it because she has school). I am so excited to be graduating and ending this adventure and looking forward to starting more undiscovered adventures. 

Cannot wait to see what happens next!

Concluding My Dissertation

Yesterday I finished the redraft of my dissertation and rewritten the conclusion. I’m going to be honest, I was kind of pushing it away from me and I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. When I did finally got the courage to open the word document and read it, I was appalled at how terrible it was. I have written a lot of essays since I was 12 and by now I knew when something was slightly off. I mean, I knew I did rush it a bit so my dissertation supervisor can mark it and so it wasn’t my best work but I didn’t think it would be so awful. I then spent two days procrastinating and looking at it like it was a piece of turd that’s been left to dry where I hoped the rain would just wash it away but of course in the end I needed to scrape it off the concrete anyways. I spent yesterday re-doing the whole conclusion until I was satisfied that it was the best I can do. 

Once I have written the last words of my conclusion and combined it to the other sections of my dissertation, I felt so relieved. I finally finished everything and it felt so good to know that all I have to is just re-read it, add the contents page and the abstract and fix some citation issues. But at the same time, a part of me felt attached and nostalgic. As much as I said to myself that I hated this dissertation, in truth I really loved writing about it. I was writing about something that interested me and about a show (OUAT) that I absolutely love.  I got the chance to explore various aspects of my chosen topic and as an added bonus, I got to read a lot of general and very explicit fan fictions (which I already did in my spare time anyways haha). But once it sunk in that I was writing the very last words, I felt like crying. I have been working on this since September last year (or June, if you count the research phase) and at the beginning I was shaking my head and telling myself there is no way on earth I could write 10,000 words by April, But here we are, nearly finished and feeling sad that’s its over. 

I don’t really know why I feel so sad about something that I couldn’t wait to get rid off even at the very start. But I guess, I have bonded with it, I gave it some words on the page and took it into several directions, redrafted it so many times and stared at it for a few hours, hoping it would write itself. Now, it is all written and with only a few more bits to add, it will be ready to travel through the World Wide Web on its own at the end of the month and I won’t get to see how it turns out until the end of May or the beginning of June. 

Concluding my dissertation feels like concluding the end of my university life and in a way just like how my dissertation must go off and be assessed, I will have to leave university and do some self-assessment of my own in terms of what I want to do next. Even though both cases can be very scary, it is also very exciting as I discover my next undiscovered adventures. 

Now I must go do my other essays and then finalize my dissertation towards the end of the month before I say good luck and goodbye to my dissertation. (hopefully it will come back safe and sound).