You did it, Mr Llama!!

Oh My Geoffery! After three years, you have just gone and finished your degree and going to graduate next month. Where did the time go? I am so proud of you, Hun. I know this will probably be really cheesy (but we like cheese) and filled with PDAs but I don’t care cause my awesome boyfriend is done with university. Woohoo! The last three years has been a total adventure filled with more random phrases and plenty of emotions. There were a lot of laughter and long conversations and some tears shed too. But despite everything, you just persevered and you have finally reached the end of your university journey.

I feel so proud of you and all the things you have achieved so far and I look forward to seeing you achieve even more wonderful things in the years to come. I am so glad I met you and got the courage to talk to you 4 years ago at the bus stop outside of Sixth Form. In the 4 years, I have gotten to know you, you have constantly been a positive influence and always willing to fill people’s life with happiness. You want to make people smile and you hate being part of conflict (something which has been tested several times during the three years of uni). The three years has been fairly difficult and you have expressed feeling upset or outcast but even then you did not let any of the negativity get to you and you made the best of all the worst situations. I admire your motivation to stay true to yourself and never let anyone belittle your views or close your mind up to the opinion of others. You went through a lot of emotions during all the years of your university journey but you have done so well to manage everything even it did require some extensions. I am so happy you can now celebrate and breathe away all the stress and just embrace the freedom of a university graduate (graduation next month), I am so excited for you.

Another thing that was tested was our relationship as we didn’t know how a long distance relationship was gonna play out as we both didn’t have a job so getting to see each other and hanging out was going to be difficult. For three years, we made do with calls, texts and Skype as our form of communication and there have been a few arguments about when will we get to meet up. I know it was frustrating and took a lot of patience before we got to see each other again on February 16 of this year lol. But I really thought it was worth it and even if it was a long time waiting, getting a few hours to spend with you was so magical. (so magical that I cried for two days after you left haha). Our relationship has gone through a lot of ups and downs, we have created new meanings for words and we have had our fights and random moments but all in all, I couldn’t be happier having you as part of my life, if not physically but mentally and emotionally. I hope to make more memories with you, my darling Llama King. I love you so much. No words can express how much I adore you and appreciate all the things we have experienced so far.

You are an amazing person/llama and I am so proud and happy of all your success stories so far and I am sure there will be plenty more now that you have ticked off getting a degree from your list. The world better be ready for Mr Llama, (soon-to-be) Philosophy, Politics and Ethics BA Hons Graduate to conquer the world as a musician/lawyer/teacher/pirate/gangsta fish/ whatever you chooses to do lol. So, I hope you enjoy your little break before and after graduation with your friends and family.

Go and show the rest of the world your swagtastic and chuggarific powers!

One Month of Job Hunting

I can’t believe it has already been over a month since I submitted my dissertation, the month of May has ended and it is now June. That means I have been basically hunting for jobs for a month now. May has definitely been hectic and filled with stress and my right forefinger glued to the scroll down button as I skimmed passed hundreds and thousands of jobs on every single job websites you can think of. I feel like day after day my head would explode and sleep always won at the end as soon as my head hit the pillow. I wish I could say this journey had been fun so far but that would be lying.

At the start of the month, I was ready to jump into looking for work cause why waste time when there are plenty of opportunities available out there, right? I was so ready to go look for some work that will help me get ahead of everyone and gain some experience in an area where I hope to keep climbing. I wanted a job related to my degree, Media Studies, where I can feel that going to university and having £27,000 debt on my shoulders would pay off (and be paid off quickly). I was ready to go conquer the Media world like those beautiful people you see in the movies where they are so hyped about the next step of looking for work and they just get it like destiny made it that way. Unfortunately, sometimes reality isn’t like what you see in the movies and the world doesn’t want to co-operate with how you see your life playing out. There wasn’t much media related job in Cambridge and those that are available require previous experience (which I don’t have)and right now going off to London or some other place would be pointless since I don’t graduate until October. So what do you do when no jobs are available that suits your preferences? You go to the next related thing that will help you gain experience, Apprenticeships.

I applied for an apprenticeship before and I didn’t get that. So, I was not too sure if applying for more is a good idea. But it was worth a shot and it WILL help me gain training and make connections with more people in the industry so its a start. I applied for a lot of media-related apprentices in areas such as digital marketing and social media. I just wanted to find something to do which will help me gain money and just some experience in a workplace. I applied for five apprenticeships in total (so far) and received one phone call. I was so nervous getting a phone call as I hate talking to people on the phone but I did gather up the courage to phone them back (I missed it and it went to voicemail cause hungry lol) and they just asked me to send them an email about the modules I did at university. The email was sent off and I never received anything back from them which made me feel kinda sad. However, I knew there are other areas I can try going into even if this did end with a dead end.

One of those areas was doing an internship around Cambridge which was fairly difficult as there isn’t much of those here either but I knew no one will take me if it having experience that they are looking for. By this point in the job searching journey, I was feeling a little down that there wasn’t much happening and it is not happening as quick as I had anticipated. I was also at the point of doubt and frustration as the only option ultimately will be an internship in London as there are dozens there. But even then and right now, I feel with how the world is going I need to hold off going further away but if it comes to graduation and I am still jobless, going to do an internship is still on the cards. In the meantime, my mum has suggested I go down a different path and see how I do in another career which is childcare as my work experience was a Playgroup Assistant. Many people have told me that I do so good with children so I thought I’d try it and maybe this is the path I was destined to discover. So, I have put aside all the media stuff for now and I applied for non-qualified nursery jobs and other childcare jobs such as playworker around my local area and Cambridge. I did apply for other various jobs such as a data entry clerk and an office assistant but I was rejected. But despite the rejection, at the end of May, I have been in communication with an agency which supplies teaching assistant and nursery assistant roles in various schools around Cambridge and my application and details are currently under clearance. I also had an interview for a playworker role in a primary school in Cambridge and another playworker role application form was filled out for another school in my local area. Everything is in the balance right now and I will update you guys with more information if I am successful or not. (either way, I am getting practice in doing interviews, making and answering phone calls and completing application forms so it is still benefitting me).

A month of job hunting has just finished and with the summer just around the corner, more days of job hunting is still to come. It is a long journey but hopefully a worthwhile one and it is all part of the adventures I will need to discover as part of life. Wish me luck guys and let’s see where this adventure will take me.

The Three Years Ends

After three years of stress and a lot of headaches, my time at university is done. I do not have to do any more lectures. No more participating or not participating in seminars. No more early, afternoon or really dark rides on the bus. No more pressing the button for the automatic doors so I can go in or out of uni. No more tapping in at every lesson. No more getting bombarded by people wanting me to do surveys or giving out leaflets that I will throw in the bin anyway. No more university.

I finished my last day yesterday with a quick review session for one of my modules. It only lasted 30 minutes which seemed pointless but at least I could stretch my legs a bit and walk around university for the last time. I’m going, to be honest there really isn’t much to miss at university. I know that for some people university is the time to go down pubs or go clubbing to socialize. University is the place where you will find out who you are and what you want in life. By going to university, you will become more independent because you are away from your parents. University will be that place you will miss when it all ends. But all those things were never true for me. I prefer to stay at home watching cartoons and binge-watch my shows than going drinking out and living the club life. I lived with my parents for the three years whilst I was university and as far as I can tell it made me independent in ways I didn’t think it could. I did house chores (except cooking but I promise I’ll learn after my essays, Mum and Dad) and my parents also let me budget my student finances and I was even able to help a bit with a few things needed for the house. Staying at home also made me value family more which I did not value as much when I was still a teenager. I know a lot of people were telling me that I shouldn’t stay at home because it will ruin my time at university but if I did,  I believe I would have regretted it, especially with my little sister. Looking after her has been the best time to come out of the university experience and the reason I loved coming back home to my family. My family has been a big support system for me and even though we have fought and shouted at each other several times these three years, we have also made more funny and loving memories that I will cherish forever.

My experience at university was pretty good but I don’t think I will miss it as much as others make it out to be. I will probably miss the friends I’ve made and the some of the teachers which have impacted my life in terms of improving me as a person or helping me gain skills which I can use more in life but the experience…not so much. It was filled with stress, I cried a lot, threw a few things, dug my nails into stuff, swore and raised my middle finger at those elements that tried to rain on my semi-constructed parade. I didn’t really join any societies or made an impact there but I was able to do the one thing which I came to do when I told myself that university is the way. I was able to stick it through to the end and make my family and friends proud that soon I will be done with all the essays (just one more to do) and the three years of university will officially come to an end.

As for university helping me find who I am and what I want to do in life… I’ll keep you posted on that one when I know for sure. Now it’s time to finish the last ever university essay and once that’s all submitted I need to go searching for the next adventure to explore. So for now, thank you university friends and (some) teachers, it’s been fun knowing you and make sure you keep in touch.

See you at Graduation. 🎓

Concluding My Dissertation

Yesterday I finished the redraft of my dissertation and rewritten the conclusion. I’m going to be honest, I was kind of pushing it away from me and I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. When I did finally got the courage to open the word document and read it, I was appalled at how terrible it was. I have written a lot of essays since I was 12 and by now I knew when something was slightly off. I mean, I knew I did rush it a bit so my dissertation supervisor can mark it and so it wasn’t my best work but I didn’t think it would be so awful. I then spent two days procrastinating and looking at it like it was a piece of turd that’s been left to dry where I hoped the rain would just wash it away but of course in the end I needed to scrape it off the concrete anyways. I spent yesterday re-doing the whole conclusion until I was satisfied that it was the best I can do. 

Once I have written the last words of my conclusion and combined it to the other sections of my dissertation, I felt so relieved. I finally finished everything and it felt so good to know that all I have to is just re-read it, add the contents page and the abstract and fix some citation issues. But at the same time, a part of me felt attached and nostalgic. As much as I said to myself that I hated this dissertation, in truth I really loved writing about it. I was writing about something that interested me and about a show (OUAT) that I absolutely love.  I got the chance to explore various aspects of my chosen topic and as an added bonus, I got to read a lot of general and very explicit fan fictions (which I already did in my spare time anyways haha). But once it sunk in that I was writing the very last words, I felt like crying. I have been working on this since September last year (or June, if you count the research phase) and at the beginning I was shaking my head and telling myself there is no way on earth I could write 10,000 words by April, But here we are, nearly finished and feeling sad that’s its over. 

I don’t really know why I feel so sad about something that I couldn’t wait to get rid off even at the very start. But I guess, I have bonded with it, I gave it some words on the page and took it into several directions, redrafted it so many times and stared at it for a few hours, hoping it would write itself. Now, it is all written and with only a few more bits to add, it will be ready to travel through the World Wide Web on its own at the end of the month and I won’t get to see how it turns out until the end of May or the beginning of June. 

Concluding my dissertation feels like concluding the end of my university life and in a way just like how my dissertation must go off and be assessed, I will have to leave university and do some self-assessment of my own in terms of what I want to do next. Even though both cases can be very scary, it is also very exciting as I discover my next undiscovered adventures. 

Now I must go do my other essays and then finalize my dissertation towards the end of the month before I say good luck and goodbye to my dissertation. (hopefully it will come back safe and sound). 

These Essays are Giving Me Pimples

My essays are giving me pimples. I have been sitting on my butt in the dining room for nearly 5 hours and I have only written 700 words. I literally have a pimple on my forehead and a tiny pimple and a huge pimple on my chin. I really think its all the stress and the worries I am going through that has caused multiple pimples to appear on my face. Its a good thing I am not leaving the house until I have to go back to uni for my last two days lol. 

Still have to write 6272 words and I just found another pimple on my finger knuckle. YAY Stressful Times. 

Spring Clean Done

I just finished cleaning my room after two months of not properly cleaning it. I am so pleased that I spent today cleaning and de-cluttering everything in my room so I can make room for more things and more mess in the future. I also think that cleaning the room will create better vibes and atmosphere so I can focus on doing my essays and finding jobs and making decisions that will really impact what I will be doing in the future. I did stumble on a few issues while I was cleaning like nearly breaking the fan (big praise to people who are really good at repairing because I nearly broke the fan and it took me two hours to restore it back to its original form-well almost) and inhaling all the dust that has been building up on top of cabinets and in drawers. But I am so glad I finally got it done and I can breathe a bit better and sleep comfortable at night (although I will probably have to do all-nighters with these essays) knowing that the room is clean and I do not have to cleaning again until I finish university. 

P.S I think the spring cleaning definitely worked because I got a 1st class (70%) on my reception study. 

Last Lecture/Seminar

Last lecture and seminar today before the Easter Break. I can’t believe it has gone so quick already. I wish I could enjoy the holidays but I have to write the essays and refine my dissertation some more as well as the PDP. I’m glad that it’s nearly the end and I do not have to write another essay in my life after this. But at the same time, I am also scared that I won’t have anything to do after it is all finish so everything right now is kinda bittersweet.

Anyways I’m just gonna try and get through the day and enjoy the last lecture and seminar before it’s time to hop on the bus back home and relax with some Chinese Takeway with my family and then a long sleep before tomorrow essay writing and tidying the house will resume.